BOY MATH

a workshop on patriarchy, for the “good men” and the people who love them

BOY MATH: a workshop on patriarchy

TL;DR:

  • for whom? — for the “good men” and the people who love them

  • when? — October 19 + 20, 3-4:30pm ET. POSTPONED.

  • how much? — $98

BOY MATH is an online workshop that teaches the theory, praxis, and skills of unraveling patriarchy.

We address the ways in which internalized misogyny and other systems of oppressions shape our relationships; we name how toxic masculinity corrupts power; and we learn how to practice the labor of intimacy and relational repair — with the people we love and also with ourselves.

Patriarchy (and white supremacy and capitalism) teaches us that we don’t need each other. Patriarchy insists that we’re better off alone — isolated, lonely. Each and every relationship between people of different genders is built within this foundation of mistrust, harm, and power.

Turning towards one other, then, is a choice — and not one that comes easily. How do we take on the voices of shame and neglect when they are so deeply embedded? How do we transform instead to the joy of vulnerability and relational intimacy?

In this two-day workshop, we’ll learn the theory and practice the skills. And in case you’re wondering — this is the place to ask the questions you don’t know who to ask, so we’ll save plenty of time for Q&A.

syllabus

day 1: theory

We start with the not-so-basic basics. Misogyny is bad — sure, obvi, got it — but how exactly does it pervade our interactions with each other? How does patriarchy shape our expectations of intimacy and relational skill? What even is toxic masculinity, and how do we know if it’s showing up in our relationships — or worse, in ourselves?

day 2: praxis

What are relational skills? How do we approach conflict as an opportunity for repair, and how do we practice building safety and vulnerability? And how are those skills influenced by other systems of oppression, too, like homophobia, transphobia and capitalism? In this session, we’ll explore the actual, tangible steps it takes to unravel the threads of patriarchy within us and show up better — healthier, happier, kinder.

what people say

Shivani is a warm and compassionate facilitator. Every session was enjoyable, even when we discussed hard topics. She makes it easy to share and dive deeper.

— Rebecca W.

You show up with a smile, a laugh, and light in your eyes and help others to take a deep breath when things are challenging. Your presence in a room brings calm to a storm.

— anon

 FAQs

  • Hi! I’m Shivani. I am a teacher and a writer, a doula and a facilitator, and a queer and disabled femme. I am not a physical, mental, or behavioral health provider, a therapist, or a clinician. I cannot “fix” or take away pain or grief or trauma. What I can do is offer you the tools that I have learned over a lifetime of study and practice.

  • This class holds the nuance of multiple truths at once. We will not tolerate bias, discrimination, or bigotry of any kind. I also recognize that we are all in a process of learning and unlearning, and this class will encourage and make space for us to unravel our own internalized -isms.

    Intimacy and vulnerability are just invitations; the depth is always up to you and your agency and choice.

  • Yes, class will be recorded. I encourage you to be present for the live sessions on Thursday, October 19 and Friday, October 20, from 3-4:30p ET. Class replays will be shared via the course platform, with lifetime access. This class has closed captions.

  • The cost of this class is $98. All sales are final.

  • Gorgeous! Reach out here, and I’ll answer soon.